Eyedust

I just picked a couple apps. Obsidian is a good one, but you have to want to open it because there’s no widgets. So my ideas go there. But I also have an open source app from F-Droid simply called Tasks that has a really sleek homescreen widget.

Now every time I open my phone those unchecked tasks taunt me and I MUST check them off. If I don’t because I’m being lazy it starts to eat at me that there’s an unchecked overdue task. Must. Do. Dishes.

Yeah, I was diagnosed with severe chronic anxiety, but I also have an ADHD diagnosis from when I was a kid and tested for autism. When I broke my tailbone and they gave me oxycodone, it was bliss. I could just focus and really lock in to things that interested me. It comforted me.

I could only take 5mg. Any time I tried 10mg I panicked. So, when I ran out, I looked for an alternative that could do the same thing and found Kratom. I don’t recommend it, really. That’s why I’m still working with my doctor. I want to get off it.

Hasn’t helped me yet, but that’s because I haven’t found a med that doesn’t give me wild side effects.

• SSRIs - Nightmares, anorgasmia, RLS, insomnia leading into mania.
• SNRIs - Sleeping nearly 20 hours a day for a week. Also had a real side effect called something like “excessive disrupting and disturbing yawning” where I would constantly have yawn attacks and could not stop yawning for ten minutes. It actually drove me into a panic attack because it was messing up my breathing.
• NDRIs - This was a wild one. I was angry and combative. I wanted to destroy everything I touched and I didn’t even care.

I’m going back tomorrow to tell the doc that the SNRIs didn’t work, so hopefully I can try something else. Right now I have hydroxyzine as needed and it somewhat works, but it also causes nightmares for me as well if I take it too late, which kind of kills the point of taking it on sleepless nights.

At this point I’ve just been continuing Kratom. But again, I can’t take it at night due to vivid nightmares. Seems like anything that ups my serotonin does it to me.

I used to go to the retirement home in the cul-de-sac down the road. No kids really thought about going there, they’d just stay on their own roads and streets. The old lonely folks there were practically waiting at the door, all outside lights on. My friend and I would make out like bandits every year with big bars, popcorn balls, homemade fudge and cake bars. Literal pillowcases full of top shelf candy and baked goods.

Just thinking of commands I need to learn, and I think chroot is up there. Iirc, you can recover from some extremely bad system states with an ISO and chroot.

I understand the basics of what it does from it’s description, I just haven’t really dived deep enough to feel comfortable with it.

It definitely got less hyperactive and more fogbrain, as I like to call it.

Me sitting on the couch listening to my clock and making it go from “tick tock tick tock” to “tock tick tock tick” back and forth in my head for 27 minutes straight.

They do, but not all the time. Most people can stay on one subject. With some ND individuals, particularly those with ADHD, one subject is every subject depending on what you are thinking at the time.

Carnivals could have easily become candy making videos, because spinning cotton candy is like the process of candy making on a tiny level, but hey, have you seen them break a candy bubble in this vid?

Candy like that is actually really hot and I bet those burns suck if you get one. I grabbed a stick in the fire once and didn’t see the hot coal on the end, so I could only imagine what molten candy would do to you.

Its basically molding edible magma. Speaking of magma, did you know that Old Faithful is an underground volcano and if it erupted it would probably destroy half of North America? At least, that’s what I heard.

From here we could go onto apocalypse talk, National Parks, or even the Yellowstone TV series. The world is your oyster and your brain will not stop.

My posts and comments here on Lemmy speak for themselves…

Iirc, spotlight update stole a bunch from Alfred, but Alfred can still do way more. So far I’ve used:

Windows:

• Keypirinha
• Flowlauncher

Linux:

• Ulauncher
• Albert
• Rofi (more specifically, Rofi Wayland)

Out of them all, Rofi is the most complex, but the most rewarding. I have a Rofi script launcher that I found and edited from github here.

So far I’ve managed to edit the lock and logout script to work on Wayland KDE and then downloaded rofi-games to slot it into where the window switcher should be (its great, has all my Steam titles, Lutris titles, and even my Prism Launcher modded Minecraft instances).

Meta-Space will bring up my power menu to shutdown, logout, etc. Alt-Space will bring up the app launcher, but I can shift-arrow to filesystem to browse for documents or folders to open, commands to run simple terminal commands, or rofi-games to launch any game.

I’m short a window switcher, but it doesn’t seem to work on Wayland afaik. I’m more used to alt-tabbing anyway.

Here’s my anxiety/ADHD journey:

Lexapro: Could not orgasm. My elbows became weirdly restless and I couldn’t sleep for more than four hours. Started becoming manic. I didn’t want to commit suicide, but the idea didn’t really upset me, either.

Zoloft: Everything with the Lexapro except the anorgasmia.

Wellbutrin: Angry as all hell for two weeks, then that gave way into a drooling stupor where I was content to just do nothing. At least with my ADHD I could do half of something.

Duloxetine: Ever wanted to sleep more than a day? Take this. I couldn’t stay awake for more than two hours at a time before sleeping 5-10 hours again. Also had a side effect called “excessive, disrupting, and disturbing yawning”. I’d have yawn attacks that would last 20-30 yawns. They were actually kind of frightening.

In the end I wound up going back to Kratom. None of the above worked for me. I seemed to have every side affect in the book.

Edit: I will make an honorable mention for Hydroxyzine. Its like a super benadryl. Its like… part anti-histamine, part anti-anxiety, and part pain reliever. Its generally super safe; it doesn’t mess with your body’s chemical balance.

That means you can take a hydroxyzine with most other meds and safely drink on it (it does compound the dizzyness and sleepyness so do NOT drive). Here’s the good part: with ADHD one standard pill will put you into a calm focus and you’ll feel awake (roughly 4-6 hours). Two at bedtime has the severe side effect of pillow drooling. You’ll go night night and it won’t force you to sleep (which tends to give me even worse panic attacks).

And it is EXTREMELY easy to get a prescription for, since its probably one of the safest and least mind altering anti anxiety you can take.

Me: …I forgot what I was going to put here, but rest assured it was something clever.

I used just plain command prompt for a long time when I was on Windows, but I did find a nice one called Tabby. The only problem is getting it to run as your default terminal.

Yeah, I’ll pass. If I want a GameOS I’ll just go SteamOS, Arch, or Nobara. I donate to things I like and leave if they start grabbing at my wallet. I know donations are slim in most projects and its a major problem, but cryptocurrency is not the answer.

Lutris, Steam, and Retroarch will cover everything I need. No need to reinvent the wheel.

Ahhh, I see. There should be others that have run into the same issues you have. Don’t give up! I’m sure you’ll run across something that works.

Linux is a great community to be in. I will say that before it rose in gaming popularity, there was a lot of gatekeeping, though. But in the end, 99% of Linux users are just people that go, “I KNOW this can work, and I won’t stop until either I break my system or I figure out how it works.”

This is very true, but iirc Obsidian has a community plugin that solves this. Just checked and its called Relay and even has offline editing. Not sure how its set up, because I know that Obsidian sync is a paid service.

I’d love to move off of Obsidian to a MD editor that’s completely open source, but I’ve tried them all and nothing tickles my fancy. I just love the plugin community for Obsidian. But that’s why I’m working on Neovim, because the plugin community there is HUGE.

Curious, I checked for Neovim collaboration solutions and found this.

Its a shame, I used to love OpenOffice and used it a lot. That was years ago. Now I use LibreOffice solely for Excel or else my resumes. Book writing I use novelWriter; notes I use Obsidian. What can I say, I love my markdown editors. I’m currently setting up Neovim to handle all my MD writing needs, though. I’m happy with my MD editors, but it gives me something to do and I like the idea of having one application handle it all.

Hm, well it looks like others have been putting out some good troubleshooting tips for the controller. Linux should have kernel modules to deal with every controller and it’s wireless. I know my Dualsense works wirelessly out of the box with everything because of the hid_playstation module

Sleep and hibernation is a well known common issue. I feel like its more hardware related than software, as some people have no issue and some need to do a little tinkering to get it to work. I know my PC will hibernate but not sleep. Or vice versa. I can never remember because I don’t like my PC going to sleep on principle. I haven’t done any troubleshooting because I don’t use it anyway. I just know there are a ton of fixes floating around on the web for you to try.

Flickering and visual glitches is something I used to have. I used to get weird diagonal lines across my screen when certain colors would be in a certain position. There’s a few things that could do this. First, if you’re using an Nvidia card, be sure to use proprietary drivers on Linux install rather than Nouveau. Nouveau is getting better, but still isn’t quite ready for gaming imo.

Second, you could try another video output. I fixed my diagonal lines by switching from Display Port to HDMI. My friend suggested it and I was sure it wouldn’t work, but to my surprise it did. Third, if you’re using Wayland you could try to switch to X11 (or vice versa if you’re using X11).

Hmmm… that’s strange. Afaik, Xbox controllers should be very well supported out of the box in most distros.

Ahhhh, I see. I did a bit of reading out of curiousity. You’re looking to have it work wirelessly. Hmm. I see a forum post troubleshooting the same thing recommending a package called xpadneo. There’s a github page for it here and it seems to have some package maintainers in a handful of distros (you can use the manual method if your distro isn’t listed).

I checked it on the AUR, the most up to date maintained package was from last December, so the app seems fairly up to date(ish). If you want to see the forum post I was talking about its this one.

Good luck, hope you get it working.

One that’s worked for Microsoft many times before (docx, for example). Its their favorite loophole.