Mossy Feathers (She/Her)

After I gained awareness, it took me another 10 yrs to start hrt due to a mix of factors. Don’t be like me. Don’t put it off, it does more psychic damage to yourself than you’d think.

QUICK, IS IT DEBIAN, DREAMCAST, OR ESTROGEN

Did you know that he worked for Blizzard for seven years? Not only that, but he was Blizzard’s first second-generation employee. He grew up in Blizzard. An extreme accomplishment to be certain. Thank you based and blizzpilled Pirate Software.

I wonder if he was the one stealing the breast milk. After all, I’ve heard he can be really childish.

Honestly, he should make the visor part of his normal outfit. He looks so weird without it.

Yes? Go on, tell me what I’m gonna find out. Whatchu gonna show me? <w<

If you’re a dom, prove it >w>

Are you a dom?

Ngl, that seems like a terrible idea. I mean, look at me. I use Lemmy. Granted, I’m a very subby bottom, but ye.

Imagine having a hot dommy lesbian girlfriend. Couldn’t be meeee.

I don’t even know where to look.

I have a friend who understands this incredibly well. Whenever I’m out with them, they’ll intentionally use my pronouns in conversation with people. They won’t be like, “mossy’s pronouns are…”, they’ll just casually slip a few "she"s and "her"s in while making obvious they’re referring to me.

Aaaaaaaa! I love them! Thank you! <:

Anything with feathered raptors?

I just woke up, but do you have any dinosaur stickers?

It’s honestly still appreciated.

I meant that I’m too numb to feel anything. As much as I need them, affirmations don’t do anything for me anymore except make me feel even more numb and fake. I appreciate what you’re trying to do though.

I’m too numb :c

Thanks tho.

Cis people are weird, ngl. Especially cis men. The amount of entitlement I’ve observed that many cis men have, and the fact that the “nice guys” rarely speak up against those who believe themselves to be entitled, is insane. They want to make choices for others. They believe themselves to know everything. They think they’re the best. So they do absolutely horrible things to people like forcefully change people’s sex at birth. They are God’s gift to humanity, apparently.

Life doesn’t owe you anything; and yet, cis men are the most likely to act like life owes them everything.

Oh and by the way, dear reader, if you feel personally called out by this then maybe you need to look in the mirror and ask yourself why you feel that way. I know this is an issue from personal experience. I’m speaking as someone who has experienced the man’s world for about 30yrs and is transitioning to the woman’s world. The difference is bigger than I could have ever imagined.

Honestly, felt.

I’m 30. I started hrt in December of last year. I waited way too long and now I feel like I’ll never be fully fem. Hell, I remember clearly when I was younger, being told by my grandparents how handsome and manly I was becoming. They told me they noticed my torso and shoulders broadening, and that girls would like that. I clearly remember the disgust and discomfort that I experienced from that despite happening over 10yrs ago.

I’m very socially stunted from a life lived in seclusion as a result of my dysphoria. Romantic relationships are a new concept to me. My first experience being intimate with someone was with another trans woman who turned out to be a predator. I was too easy for her to manipulate as a result of my naivete, and she eventually raped me.

I’m lonely. I feel broken. I feel like trash that should be shoved into a pile and left to rot. The emotions I began feeling as a result of hrt have been suppressed again. I am numb and dead inside. I know I have feelings, I can see it in my behavior. I know there is someone I love, and I know she loves me in return. I get excited when I see her. When I’m with her I want to stay glued to her. I miss her when she’s gone. Yet, these are observations based on my behavior. In reality, I do not actually feel anything. As much as I want to, I am too numb to actually commit and put a name on our relationship. Besides, I’m American, she’s Chilean. If I went to visit her then it’d be a one-way trip out of the country. God forbid she comes here.

My only comfort is friends telling me that I already pass really well, and that I look like I’m in my early 20s as opposed to beginning my 30s. I’m not sure I believe them because I still get misgendered by strangers, but I appreciate them trying.

However, as fucked up as my personal journey has been, I believe that, as small and inconsequential as I may be, my journey plays a tiny part in helping the trans children of the future. My small voice, combined with others, will help keep us from obscurity and help keep future generations from the misery I have experienced. True progress doesn’t happen overnight. It is a pebble helping guide the water to erode the mountainside.

To tell you the truth, I’ve considered ending it; but I keep going because of the friends and family in my life. I keep going because of the woman I love. I keep going for future generations. So I continue to take my hormones, swallow my misery and try to make the best of it. My only hope is that, if an afterlife exists, I will be able to live out eternity in my true form, in happiness.

Damn, girl. You look good!

T~T

Tbh, I’m starting to look into it myself, though I still have +6mo before insurance will cover it. However, considering how long I’ve heard the waiting period can be, maybe now is the best time to start thinking about it and looking for surgeons.