I have watched the trans hate as the canary in the coal.mine but also just as weirdness. When i was a kid trans was a medical curiosity, not a moral outrage and to see the change is eminent proof of societal madness. However i feel about femaleness or transness or my own very personal confusion I will never forget that trans people are people and their rights must be protected. The protective instinct is 100%, justified. I hope that whatever our differences you can at least know that i will stand for trans rights.

Thank you, that was a great, educational comment and i found much to relate to. Im not going to respond right now because a knee jerk reaction would not be productive but i want you to know that i have read and i am ruminating on what you have said. It was not in vain! You have my ear and i will come back to this. I genuinely thank you for your effort and time and i sound like a complete fucking wanker but i actually mean well just shoot me! Sorry

I’m aware of the third gender people and personally identifying as a woman was not intended as a repudiation of that. I repudiate noones identity. That is anathema. I am only trying to assert my own which is defined in a now out of date way. Im trying to get you all to understand why it can be a bit confusing to accept that trans women are women, but it doesn’t mean hate. It takes a broader definition of woman, and thats hard when your definition of woman is meaningless chromosomes. Again, i affirm that trans women are women and welcome trans women into all spaces hitherto assigned to women.

You understand me well, the problem is that i identify as a woman and i stubbornly refuse the non binary/agender whatever. Im a woman, i just dont think it means much so i very much resent being told that it means something and trans certainly seems like it’s meaningful. Anyway, you get me :)

I never questioned anyone’s identity. Show where i did? I have never dead named or claimed a woman is a man or vice versa. I acknowledge that trans women are women, i also admit to confusion since it changes my own identity. The op attacked feminists like me and thays why i responded. I usually say nothing.

I never said any such thing. I fully affirm gender affirming care as healthcare and i want my aussie tax dollars to pay for it.

I do recall being taught that left handed and right handed people had bigger brain differences than men and women. But if gender is so unimportant, as it is to me, then why trans? This is not an anti trans question! It is an ‘i don’t get it’ question. As always, i fully support trans peoples rights, especially to healthcare.

I think anything remotely construed as terf would fail their respect rule. Trans support is an all or nothing here.

How do you reconcile all that with research showing trans women have female brains? And where does that come from? Clearly not the chromosomes. I think you get me in the ‘it’s all bollocks’ way. I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s all relative, and i absolutely define my own womaness (as meaningless), as always, i am not anti trans.

I just want to point out that there is nowhere on the fediverse where a person can ask these questions and the op started the conversation by accusing feminists of my age group of being terfs.

Ok, honestly that is how i lived my life. Im a woman because of chromosomes and it means nothing day to day. I feel like your ‘treated as a woman’ is not the same as my treated ‘like a person’. Woman means something to you but to me it’s incidental. I’ve always been here being a woman with no real meaning attached to that. Now there are people attaching meaning and that makes me uncomfortable because i can’t relate to their meaning. Whether it’s makeup and fashion or babies and boob jobs or whatever. I’m a person first and a mani pedi is a luteral nightmare. Now we have womens stuff on lemmy and it includes makeup and fashion? Am i not a woman??,???, i’m not a man so what the fuck am i??? I feel like the stereotype is enforced more than ever and i hate it.

Im questioning who we all are, what it means to be a woman because the idenity i knew is gone. Deal with it.

It does seem to me that you are saying there is some gender essentialism going on, produced by a complex set of genes/hormones/environment (like everything else) and I don’t conform to the woman stereotype therefore I am not a woman, not really, because i dont have the feminine self expression part of the identity. What if i reject gender as an overarching identity, can i be a women despite enjoying maths and machines? Why is makeup a prerequisite for female? Tomboy does not in any way mean male, i am entirely comfortable with my body. I am not anti trans btw, i fully support all trans rights, especially healthcare, i just have confusion. I think most people see gender as very important to identity and i dont understand that.

Yeah, for all that you can delete me and tell me to fuck off. Why did you respond to me at all? You wrote a wall of text to a banned opinion to pretend you actually allow my existence.

I experience all of the same pressures that cis women do to have a conforming presentation. I enjoy wearing gendered feminine clothing because those things correlate with my own identity, with how I see myself. This is a normal thing that everyone, cisgender included, does.

I do none of these things, does it make me not a woman? Can i not be a woman without the feminine trappings?

I would encourage you to ask questions in an appriopriate space

Where is the appropriate space to speak?

Questions not allowed

Removed by mod