Once when playing a D&D game, my character was a very ‘civilized’ guildsman who constantly went on about the superiority of urban mercantilist civilization (his counterpart, the other player in the group, was a half-orc barbarian who found this whole civilization thing very appealing; we made a good team). When one quest sent us to a halfling village in the middle of the woods, and they rebuffed all my character’s offers to buy land for ‘productive enterprises’, he, of course, came to the wholly normal and completely correct conclusion that ‘these people’ did not even have the concept of private property, how sad! and resolved to educate them (by force if necessary) after the quest was finished of the benefits and necessity of a thriving bourgeois society.
Luckily for the halflings, our two-miscreant party was locked up by the local lord afterwards for a combination of kidnapping/theft/attempted sale of halflings who had been turned into stone by the cockatrice we had slain; and we were set loose on another problem (though not before committing unlawful commerce and gambling our unlicensed profits away at the local tavern playing dragon poker).
Once when playing a D&D game, my character was a very ‘civilized’ guildsman who constantly went on about the superiority of urban mercantilist civilization (his counterpart, the other player in the group, was a half-orc barbarian who found this whole civilization thing very appealing; we made a good team). When one quest sent us to a halfling village in the middle of the woods, and they rebuffed all my character’s offers to buy land for ‘productive enterprises’, he, of course, came to the wholly normal and completely correct conclusion that ‘these people’ did not even have the concept of private property, how sad! and resolved to educate them (by force if necessary) after the quest was finished of the benefits and necessity of a thriving bourgeois society.
Luckily for the halflings, our two-miscreant party was locked up by the local lord afterwards for a combination of kidnapping/theft/attempted sale of halflings who had been turned into stone by the cockatrice we had slain; and we were set loose on another problem (though not before committing unlawful commerce and gambling our unlicensed profits away at the local tavern playing dragon poker).
Thank you so much for writing this out. If there’s a community for D&D stories like this, I want to subscribe now!
Ahh, I do miss playing D&D sometimes.