I’ve been on HRT for about 6 weeks now and I’m pretty sure I’m at female levels. Got a late start at 29 and I still strongly doubt that I’m even trans and should be doing this (seriously, my story is a weird one I think). I would quite welcome being cis because that would mean I don’t have to upend my life and essentially start over under 10x more difficult conditions. I considered myself agender for a long time and maybe I am.

Before HRT I considered myself very much vers. I do understand that severe bottom dysphoria is not needed to be trans, and I intended to do maintenance to retain my ability to top. Now that I’m actually into it, my feelings have changed.

I’ve read that a full erection once a day is needed to reliably retain full function, but that sounds quite unpleasant to me now? I just don’t want to do it, and I don’t really care if I never use my genitals to top again. I’m also finding myself more welcoming to the idea of SRS.

  • Is it due to the nature of HRT and changing sex drive? I mean, duh, estrogen
  • Is it due to repression breaking? Was I masking dysphoria before?
  • Is it because I have read and internalized that this is how I should feel, in some people’s opinion, and I am conforming to that?

I don’t think it’s really the last one - I also understand I have more sexual/dating prospects if I’m vers, and I think I kinda care about that more than some fringe viewpoints about validity

  • Karabola@lemmy.worldEnglish
    3·
    1 day ago

    29 isn’t that late tbh. I know plenty that started later and have had great results.

    Regarding the upkeep situation, once a day is probably not necessary. 2 or 3 a week will keep you situated, though you’ll know if you need more. It becomes painful to have an erection if you don’t keep up, as the skin loses elasticity.

    Hrt can and will change your libido, especially early days, which you’re in. I had to keep a log of when I would use it so I wouldn’t lose it and compared to T dominance I was just never in the mood for it. That changed after a while and adding progesterone, though it was/is still different and less. If you are interested in bottom surgery it’s still prudent to keep on top of maintaining the muscle, especially if you get the penile inversion vaginoplasty, as it’ll get you better results and likely an easier time healing.

    Like another person said, you might have more dysphoria than you realized, and lessening the other issues might allow more space for other dysphoria to become more obvious. That is what the case was for me and my bottom dysphoria.

    Regarding vers/top/whatever and your dating prospects, you can be vers or a top and not use your natal junk or your junk at all. And, in my opinion, I wouldnt make decisions on your body and how you like to use it based on what other people would find appealing/useful.