Love this thread. I feel like I hover somewhere close to aroace but also not quite. I can identify with a lot of things said in this thread but feel like I don’t completely fit the description. Maybe spilling my guts about my own experience in this regard will help me figure it out.

I don’t dislike sex and intimacy but don’t actively seek it out myself and can go without indefinitely if need be (it’s probably been at least 10 years at this point anyway). But I have no aversion to it either. I can think of two people another lifetime ago with whom I had that immediate mutual electricity (and who, for reasons that would require an essay to explain, nothing ever happened with, they’re both kinda what ifs in my life) but other than that, literally every relationship or fling that I’ve had was initiated by the other person. Even my first relationship back in high school where I had zero clue what I was supposed to do and didn’t even kiss her for the first month or two lol.

And as far as romantic attraction goes, I’m not even sure what that really is. I like connecting with people on some level. If I was going to find a partner I guess I would be looking for something close to a best friend. Getting together and spending time and flirting and cuddling and all that shit is awesome. But also permanently sharing your personal space and bed and cupboard and bathroom with someone else sounds like it would be fun at first, then get a little suffocating and cause fighting and misery. Romance is fun but so is independence.

I could possibly be demisexual but I’m not sure because like I said, while I don’t go out looking for it, I never had an aversion to it whenever it found me either.

Edit: I think might come and go because sometimes it does get lonely. It comes and goes the same way as ‘gender’. As far as that goes, all I’m sure of is what I’m not. But I still float between the ‘other’ thing, a third thing or nothing.

Edit 2: I’m definitely capable of having crushes though so idk.