Seattle is a lofty goal, especially with how costly the city has become. I would suggest another nearby city with a slightly less obscene cost of living.

So Washington has all kinds of social support networks, but they’re centered more in some bigger cities such as Seattle, Tacoma, Olympia, Everett, Vancouver, and Bellingham. The Eastern half of the state (divided from the West by the cascade mountains) is very rural and conservative, if not outright MAGA. These supports exist in the East but they’re less robust and the cities are less welcoming.

What you should focus on is finding the cheapest city out of those listed above you can afford, and find a way to get work and to start putting money away for a place right away. Use all social services available to you, ask for a social worker at the Department of Health and Human services and they can help walk you through what resources are available to you. At least get on SNAP benefits in Washington if you can (requirements are a little looser out here than Louisiana, if I recall). Sign up for every program you qualify for, join every group that can help you network and get help.

The bad news is yeah, no matter which of these cities you live in, you’re going to probably end up with roommates, as a studio can run in the $1200+ a month range.

The good news is all these cities are very warmly welcome to trans folks, queer folks, neurodivergent folks, as well as vegetarians and vegans.

Cities to Avoid: Anything West of Olympia on the peninsula. Anything East of the mountains.

Universities and colleges are letting out now, so now’s a good time to start looking for trans and neurodivergent friendly housing. I’d recommend starting outside of Seattle in Shoreline, Lynnwood, and Everett, as it will probably be less expensive to live. You can always take the Link into Seattle. Look for trans and neurodivergent friendly facebook groups, craigslist postings, discord groups. Be prepared to bounce off people until you find a good place. Reach out to Express Employment or other work placement programs to see if they can find you work. If you think your BPD is severe enough to be considered a disability, you may be able to open a state disability claim and see if you can get a case manager, maybe a therapist, maybe move into an adult family home. There’s also Portland if you think the rainy weather might not be good for your mental health. Just don’t give up and try not to beat yourself up too much.

I’m actually also on Seattle (was chatting with you in the other thread). I think the biggest barrier is cost. I moved here after living in Austin TX for 7 years or so and the cost of everything from gas, to food, to housing, etc., is quite a bit higher. And although the pay here is generally higher, with the tech industry consolidation and layoffs rampant, the main source of surviving in the middle class has been drying up. If you have a good job and can work remote, you might be fine. I love the city and would choose to live in very few other places. It’s not as bad as San Francisco or LA or whatever, but it’s pretty expensive. But for comparison, after, many, many years of saving I finally own a tiny home that’s a little over 800 sq ft and over 120 years old but in reasonable shape. It’s currently valued at about $1.1 million though a few years back when I bought it, it was a few hundred K less, and no one who could afford it would buy such a small place for anything other than business like renting it out or AirBnB. It’s in a great neighborhood, though, which is why I love it, so not saying you can’t find cheaper, but just to show how crazy it can be here. It’s about double what I’ve seen in Austin that a friend was showing me they were looking at in similar location and condition despite the tech industry growing a lot there lately. It’s also really competitive due to a longterm lack of new housing to keep up with population, even for renting you need good references and usually a big deposit in addition to first and last month’s rent, other than maybe the really high-end and really low-end places.

Other than that, the weather can be a barrier of you’re coming from the south. Despite the reputation it doesn’t actually rain a lot, it’s usually just really gloomy with periodic light drizzle basically every day for months. Most people dont even use umbrellas. Though climate change has changed things since when I first moved here. It has gotten warmer earlier in the year and more strong storms.

It’s also rough meeting people outside of work or school partly because of the weather and partly because the culture is less fake friendly than the south. It’s also pretty white here. Which puts me at an advantage, but a disadvantage for some. The best part though is the gender diversity and acceptance. I can usually go out without having to be much more careful than a cis-woman. That’s only true in the cities though, which is one reason I live in such an expensive location. Outside of the city it can be hit or miss like anywhere in the US. And steer clear of more rural areas or Eastern WA, LOL.

Hope things work out for you! I’ve been homeless before and it may seem feasible to do it, but it eats at you even just considering losing conveniences like showers and refrigerators and a place to “just be”. Avoid it if you can.

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