Hello!
Making this post to check in on other asexual spectrum people. Curious how attraction works for you?
Recently discovered the term “side” and feel that fits well. Always felt obligated for penetrative sex, liked servicing but awkward when things done to me.
Been with men and women. Recently with someone could not be more my type but could not perform. Twice. Wanted to (or so I thought) but it was wanting to be a people pleaser.
When it clicked. Dont like sex. Enjoy things around it, watching partner reactions,kissing, cuddling, performing oral, but actual? It feels like pulling teeth.
Searched and searched and this seems to be a hard Google. 🤷
What prompted me to make this post.
Asexual people what has been your journey of self acceptance? How does attraction works for you? How have partners been about understanding it?
Thanks for the responses.
I (f) have struggled a lot to figure out the ace portion of my sexuality. I’m definitely deeply in that spectrum, borderline sex repulsed. I don’t think I’ve ever had “good” sex (whatever that means) so make of that what you will. My partner and I are deeply committed, but I’ve never felt an urge to do anything sexual with her. Not into men in the slightest.
I blame my ADHD in large part. Even when I’m alone, I get bored and distracted easily. The physical sensations are there but they don’t create happy brain chemicals. It’s honestly frustrating beyond belief.